David and I have always liked to go driving. It started with hour long trips to Olive Garden in Salem because we didn't have one here or a quick trip to the beach to watch the sunset. It turned into day trips to Crater Lake or up a scenic highway one last time before the snow sets in. We used to highlight all the roads we have been on and take alternate roads just to say we have gone down them. He drives and I navigate. I tell him which road to take to get where he wants to go, I prepare and hand him food so he can concentrate on the road without having to stop and we talk so he doesn't get sleepy... like I do.
He seems to be in the driver's seat again and while he sits there knowing what his eventual destination is I'm busy being the navigator, figuring out logistics, feeding him and talking to him... not so much to keep him awake as it is to keep him focused on the road right in front of him instead of thinking about what it will be like when he "arrives".
The care manager came in today to talk to us about home health care. She asked us what agency we'd like to use. Really? I didn't know we had a choice! She brought in a list of providers for us to look at. That would have been really useful information to have Friday so we could have spent the weekend doing research. Whatever, we didn't and there's nothing we can do about that so I did some calling around and decided on a couple to check out. Just as I'm about to pull my hair out Tim and Rose (the Wolfe's who are awesome!) let us know that Tim's sister worked in home health and hospice and wanted to talk to us. Perfect!
She really helped us understand a little more about the difference between home health and hospice. We're leaning towards hospice being closer to what we actually need as they offer more services but they don't always accept people who are taking chemo and the Drs want to keep him on it for the time being. They don't consider it curative which is the very definition of hospice. Hospice is for palliative treatment for comfort and often end of life type support, nothing curative. If chemo is palliative.... this is where navigating gets a little tricky. I hope the way is made clear very soon.